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AN INTERROGATION OF THE "REAL" IN ALL ITS GUISES



Hamm: What's happening?
Clov: Something is taking its course.
Beckett




Sunday, 15 June 2025

membrana sacra

We are separated from the ineffable by the thinnest of membranes. Several times I've stood and seen its shimmering surface moving as if in a silent wind. Though often seen as the passage to sacred experiences, this liminal surface itself is a hierophany. This, I think, is often overlooked in descriptions of religious experience, especially in the west, though here the Catholic and Orthodox Christian churches have already produced some important thinkers dealing with the metaphysical status of things like icons. 

The trouble with these approaches is that they're often too narrow in scope, theologically limiting their understanding of the holy/sacred to a particular tradition. The actual experience is more universal in nature. It allows for interpretation from multiple viewpoints, none of which ultimately represent the meaning of the experience. It is a very human tendency to claim that my particular experience must be the only correct one and all the others are merely derivative or false. This kind of claim has a very old and illustrious history in the Church, where the Fathers once claimed the worship, miracles, and signs of others were in fact demons at work. 

We, the seekers and lovers of the earth, have no need to take this approach. We recognize our experience of the ineffable in those liminal spaces is open to interpretation and that universality is one of its marks. Arrogance, self-assured aloofness or elitism, should not be its outcome. 

Thursday, 5 June 2025

ex ego

where there is a true word 

there is the meaning of life 

and my whole being in this world 

is not even the smallest breath 

in the hurricane of its saying



Thursday, 8 May 2025

when i go away

when i go away

leaves will swirl around 

the bleached white sidewalk 

near my home 

as if i still walked there, 

and crows will still watch from rooftops. 

the black spotted dog and his 

sidekick chihuahua will still race 

along the fence to chase away my ghost. 


if you look through the branches of 

those flowering trees you'll see the 

bluest sky. 

i'm there between the petals 

in the part that goes on forever. 

Friday, 2 May 2025

In Nepal

in Nepal I saw a tear 

fall from the eye of a Buddha 

and splash upon the earth.

as I watched, a flower grew 

in that very spot. 

it was fragrant, like freshly 

opened lilac or hyacinth. 

the Buddha's gaze was 

unperturbed, serene. 

the flower danced in the 

cool Himalayan breeze.

i had witnessed a miracle, and 


yet… 


i felt no surprise as

the flower bent toward me. 

i leaned forward, until 

my forehead touched its petals. 

10,000 suns illuminated the sky 

and i fell to the earth blind. 

i heard a buzzing noise, 

like a giant cicada coming 

closer to my ears. 

when it reached a volume 

i could hardly bear, 

it vanished and the light 

shattered to thousands of pieces. 


quiet on the mountaintop. 

wind graced my hands and hair,

my eyes remained closed.

crunching on the gravel path behind me 

as a traveller up the trail 

made summit. 

but when I opened my eyes 

there was no Buddha, 

no flower. 

a woman, her dark hair shining in 

the mountain air. 

she took my face in her hands and 

touched her forehead to mine. 

she gave me water and I slowly drank. 





Sunday, 6 April 2025

absence

the genie won't go back 

in the bottle, 

how tight the throttled 

vapors as they escape 

the chambered waiting, 

i will grant you all your wishes, 

all your papered wishes, 

and dissolve to nothing 

before your distracted 

presence. 


we will fall victim to your 

self-actualization,

memorialized by a 

mile high black obelisk 

with the words 

“ABSENCE” 

carved into its cold surface,

reflecting no light, 

invisible in the coming 

night. 






Sunday, 9 February 2025

little bird

oh time you slip away
and i can't catch my breath
as i press against this autumn chill

when the lonely bird 
finds its evening tree
and the night wind sways the
branch it calls home
she blinks the stars above
from her tear-filled eyes
and like shooting stars
they fall to the ground below
she will pass unnoticed 
she will pass unnoticed
like a dry leaf blown from its 
withered twig 

my steps beneath the
cold dark trees
a collar to the coming
winter's wind
a movement catches my eye:
a small feather swirls around
the frosty ground and passes
into the night





Wednesday, 22 January 2025

if i could drown in you


if i could drown in you
i wouldn't hold my breath
or struggle
but close my eyes and
inhale every drop of you

the water is a crystal blue tonight
and upon its surface
float two blood red roses
how perfect their last moments
together

this is a mystery
so profound it leaves me
speechless

Tuesday, 31 December 2024

L'avenir n'est pas un souvenir

Pachebel's canon played the day 
I watched you down the aisle 
Your smile made stars seem dim 
And the world was all promise
Imagine then if we knew 
Life would split in a hundred ways 
If heaven itself would fall 
For one of us 

New Year's Day 2025
J'ai vécu plusieurs vies
Je ne sais pas si
Tu connais les noms 
De mes enfants
Dans notre enfance
Nous avons rêvé de ces choses
-Rembobine, réfléchis-
Le futur est aussi 
Réel que le passé
Mais l'un est parti
L'autre est une promesse
À réaliser

Sunday, 29 December 2024

On the word OM

OM is fundamentally an orientation/position of profound gratitude.  

All living beings lose the essence of their life properties eventually: this is defined by the particular configuration of the atoms and molecules in their body and around them that enable life functioning.  Once this configuration (really configurations) is disrupted, the descending OM begins.

The beginning of the OM is of course the first moments of existence, i.e. the particular configuration manifested in the post-contact reality of egg and sperm, pollen and germ cell.  Note, this says absolutely nothing at all about the moral status of such a configuration, merely that this is the first utterance of the OM.  This is true of every living being.  

Taken from The Treatise on Other Spiritual Wisdom, Gilla Artenis


Friday, 29 November 2024

sleep beneath the foam blown waves

sleep beneath the

foam blown waves that 

crash against the ancient shore 

soon I'll be no more 

for by the ocean all things 

turn to mist and 

drift away 

no more day or

endless starry night

no more the lover’s

lamp beside the bed 

for I will shed this 

mortal flesh 

for truer sight and 

deepest night 

where even gods receive 

a perfect rest 

beneath the foam blown waves 

Monday, 25 November 2024

the devil is in the details

 The devil is in the details...

poor innocent E and A

they knew the rules and they did it anyway
they stole the thing that would have 
set them free
"we were misled!"
willfully self-directed
"we didn't know"
you were told with adamantium tongue and
impossibly clear crystalline words
the way of things

millions of consequences
billions of hurtling lives 
down the garbage shoot of a
trillion cities

these are the consequences liars!

Saturday, 26 October 2024

I promised

I promised in the last life  
I'd find her in the next 
An age went by 
And cities fell 
While worlds were turned to ash 
Before she came and grew 
And I was born and knew 
The person standing there
was you 

Every death creates a veil 
Obscuring reborn sight 
Until the sacred moment 
(often late into the night) 
The inner eye is opened 
And you see things as they are 
How bright you've shone 
To reach this eye, 
How far…


Friday, 23 August 2024

mirror

you are mirrored 
neuroses 
of each other, 
and it's love 
the bliss of love, 
the intensity of it a
cosmic rip in 
spacetime 

when will destiny be
fulfilled 
and the sighing days
cease to 
exist 





Sunday, 18 August 2024

if i waited

this whole life i've waited
for the jewel of my soul, 
and she is it and doesn't know, 
and another thinks she is, 
and another grows very curious,
another lends her ear, 
and another married a cruel, stupid man, 
still another wants to run away

my life and reason with a smile that 
could break the blazing sky,
where in the world do you 
keep your quiet home? 
will i be a gray and tired man
before the day? 


Sunday, 4 August 2024

I saw her

i lay no claim to her
and life itself cannot own
her passing
for she lives a deeper magic
untouched by any common 
hour 
but... i'd like to think
i've seen her with my
patient eyes 
sharpened by the northern wind, 
Middle Eastern suns, 
and jungles of infinite green, 
there beneath the 
lightbulb in my kitchen 
saw her. 
how was it possible? 
i was ready...