paradox

"it's all a distraction"

she said, 

"to forget your mortality" 

"hm hm," i nodded, "go on" 

"the shows, the video games, 

and from the beginning of time, 

sporting events,

to distract us from 

the main event" 

"our own death, you mean?"

(i was getting into it) 

"yes yes, and we all 

fell for it" her eyes were 

on fire

or was it the candle light 

reflected in them 

"so we reach the end of life" 

she continued

"without ever really living" 

i sat up, "wait, you mean 

without ever thinking about 

our own death" 

she broke out in that ridiculously

beautiful smile she has 

"can't you see? you can 

never really live until 

you've seen your death" 

"seen it?" 

"yup, face to face, 

felt its cold breath 

against your skin" 

i scratched my head

"seems traumatizing" i muttered 

"yes absolutely, but then 

life can become totally life, 

it's a paradox.."

her voice trailed away 

the fire in her eyes faded 

i think a part of me 

experienced a death just then. 

later as i drove home 

it started to rain 

i turned the radio off so

I could hear the raindrops 

patter against my car 

"it's a paradox.. " i murmured 

a paradox